Archive for the ‘Things that make us human’ Category
Grok first, then execute
Have you ever tried to complete a project for yourself or a client without a clear sense of where you were headed?
Of course you have. And I’m willing to bet that nine times out of ten the results were less than stellar.
In my work as a massage therapist, I discovered that if I really wanted to help someone feel better, I had to listen on many levels. It became vitally important to really grok their intended outcome, often when they hadn’t articulated it yet themselves. This usually meant pressing on with a line of conversation when the client wasn’t quite sure “where I was going with this”. It all makes sense in the end.
Sometimes it was somewhat awkward and sometimes the client would rather that I got the session started sooner rather than later. But with very few exceptions, pressing on just another moment or two, asking that extra question or being capable of being present with the awkwardness of it all, allowed me to ‘get it’ and consequently, to be able to give them exactly the session they needed.
In the end, it was always worth it. Clients walked away happy, having gotten what they came for, and I had a renewed sense of accomplishment and confidence in my abilities.
Take the time to really grok the outcome. It’s always worth it in the end.
Words to comfort a grieving friend
A treasured friend from an earlier era of life wrote to me via Facebook to seek connection and compassion in a time of grieving. I am honored to be held in this regard.
I hope my words brought some measure of relief. “My words” is not an appropriate phrasing since ‘I’ only sought higher wisdom for the lines that follow. I share them here in the hopes that they may help another or perhaps myself in some future moment.
I think that friends / relationships exist at certain times in our lives to serve each person. When a relationship ends I think it is because it’s time to move on. How this extends to your friend’s passing I don’t know. I DO know though that death doesn’t erase a person or their energy. Your friend may be close to you now, feeling no pain of their own but feeling empathy for you in your grieving.
They would probably want you to remember the best about them and to learn something from them and from their life.
I hope that your grieving doesn’t last too long. And I’m sorry for your loss of a dear friend. A Rumi poem comes to mind. It’s written for lovers but I think that it can be extended to include close friends. The quote reads “Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.” Remember this as you think of your friend and be not afraid.
Life is random, unpredictable, untamed, sometimes even savage. Live it fearlessly in love.
7%
I got this by email and thought it was so good that I had to share it.
1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come…
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.
It’s estimated 93% won’t forward this. If you are one of the 7% who will, forward this with the title ‘7%’.
Words of wisdom
I got this via email today and thought it was worth sharing:
Never deprive anyone of hope; it could be the only thing a person owns.
Don’t make decisions when you are angry.
Watch your posture.
Don’t pay for a job until it’s finished.
Beware of who has nothing to lose.
Learn how to say “no” courteously and promptly.
Don’t expect life to be fair.
Don’t hesitate to lose a battle it if helps you win the war.
Don’t procrastinate. Do what needs to be done when it needs to be done.
Don’t be afraid to say “I don’t know” and I’m sorry.
Watch the sun rise at least once a month.
Look people in the eye.
Say “please” and “thank you” often.
Spend less than what you earn.
Do unto others as you wish others did to you.
Learn how to keep secrets.
Own up to your mistakes.
Always tell the truth.
Don’t repeat all you hear, don’t say all you think.
Don’t criticize people, praise them.
Learn how to listen, it’s an art.
Don’t believe all you hear.
Enjoy beauty.
Don’t lose control at any time, take a deep breath.
You are the way you breathe.
Meditate for thirty minutes every day.
Enjoy your free time!
Cherish your friends.
Be honest, earn people’s respect.
You have the right to be happy!
Shed hate and rancour, they hurt you more than they do others.
There are things you can’t get back: the spoken word, the time that has gone by, and lost opportunities.
Do only one thing at a time.
Immortality exists, it’s called knowledge. Ask what you don’t know and remember it for when you’re asked.
Discover pleasure in simple things: eating, breathing, tasting, touching, seeing, sleeping….
Happiness is like a piggy bank, put in it as much as you can.
When I’m stressed out for whatever reason…
…I shall:
- come to this post
- put on my bitchin’ wireless headphones
- sit outside or lay on the couch and…
- listen to, possibly my favorite album of all time, MCMXC A.D. by Enigma
Now you can do the same. =)
Press play to listen right now…
MCMXC A.D. by Enigma
